Tag Clouds are useful for seeing word frequency. Below are tag clouds of the three ballads. |
Modernized Transcriptions |
The tag cloud below represents "The Advice to the Ladies of London" (Pepys 4.85). | Pepys 4.85
Advice to the Ladies of London, In the Choice of their Husbands.
To an Excellent new Court Tune. This may be Printed, R. P.
Ladies of London both wealthy and fair,
whom every Town Fop is pursuing,
Still of your Persons and Purses take care
the greatest deceit lies in Wooing:
From the first rank of the bonny brisk sparks
their Vices I here will discover
Down to the basest mechanic Degree
that so you may choose out your Lover.
First for the Courtier look to his Estate
before he too far be proceeding,
He of Court Favors and Places will prate,
and settlements make of his Breeding:
Nor wear the yoke of dull Country Clown,
although they are fat in their Purses;
Brush you with Bristles and toping full Fowls
make Love to their Dogs and their Horses.
But above all, the rank Citizen hate;
the Court or the Country choose rather;
Would you have a Blockhead that gets an Estate
by the Sins of the Cuckold his Father?
The sneaking Clown intriguing does mar,
the Prentices huffing and ranting,
Citizen puts on his Sword, when without Temple-Bar
and goes to Whitehall a Gallanting.
Let no spruce Officer keep you in awe,
the Sword is a thing Transitory;
Nor be blown up by the Lungs of the Law,
a World has been cheated before you:
Soon you will find your Captain grow bold
and then it will be hard to get from him,
But if the Lawyer touch your Copy-hold
the Devil can never bring you from him.
Fly like the Plague from the huffing brave Boys
that Court you with many Bravadoes,
Tiring your senses with Bombast and Noise
and Stories brought from the Barbados:
And besides, ever the Doctor, that Fool,
who seeking to mend your Condition,
Tickles your Pulse, peeps in your Close-stool,
then sets up a famous Physician.
Choose not a spark that has known the Town,
who makes it his Practice to Bully,
You had better take up with a Country Clown
he will make an officious Cully;
You with a word may his Passion appease
and make him a Cuckold at leisure;
Give him but money to live at his ease,
you may follow Intrigues at your Pleasure.
Neither admire much a Man that is wise,
if ever you intend to deceive him,
He cunning Plots and Intrigues will devise
and trap you, before you shall perceive him.
Therefore beware that he never disclose
your Tricks, if he does he will slight you;
He will keep a gay Mistress under your nose,
if it be but on purpose to spite you.
But if you would thrive, and grow wealthy apace,
then marry a doting old Sinner;
What if you view there Old Time in his Face,
you will by that bargain be winner;
You may have lusty Gallants good store,
if you can produce but the Guinea,
And those young Coxcombs your Face will adore
if this do not please, Old Nick is in you.
LONDON:
Printed for J. Back, at the Black Boy, near the
Draw-Bridge on London-Bridge. |
The second answer, "Advice To Young Gentlemen; OR, An Answer to the Ladies of London" (Pepys 4.87).
| Pepys 4.87
ADVICE
To Young Gentlemen;
OR, An Answer to the LADIES of LONDON,
To the Tune of, The Ladies of London. This may be Printed, R. P.
ALl Jolly Blades that Inhabit the Town,
And with the fair Sex are contriving,
From the Gay Fop, to the honest bred Clown,
be advised to resolve against Wiving;
Let not a prospect of Pleasure delude,
where so many Plagues are attending,
For it is the Nature of Wives to Obtrude,
and Miseries heap without ending
First, have a care of the Lady precise,
who exclaims against Drinking and Roaring,
That privately turns up the Whites of her Eyes
and in public abominates Whoring:
But if you Coach her a mile out of Town
and quote her but Solomons Vices;
With a slight trip you may tumble her down,
though seeming she modestly nice is.
Let no City-Girl your Freedom beguile,
she will cheat you with modest behavior,
Who sits like a Rabbit trussed up for to boil,
and swears she is a Maid by her Savior:
But if you cunningly manage your Plot,
you will quickly be admitted under;
Her coy behavior will soon be forgot,
she will breath out her Soul in a slumber.
The Widow avoid where Policy lurks
pretending to act by her Conscience
That is black as the Devil and large as a Turks
she will tease you to Death with her Nonsense:
But if you love her and long for a Bout,
you never must stand mincing the matter,
Brush her with Jollity briskly about,
and down with your Britches and at her.
Let not the Country wench that is coy,
insinuate into your favor
For when she knows what it is to enjoy
she quickly will change her behavior:
Turn an insatiate Miss of the Town,
to purchase Gallants she will endeavor;
Pawn from her Carcass her Paragon Gown
to maintain the courteous Pleasure.
But if your Vigor a Wife doth require
and will not admit of forbearing;
Any may serve for to quench your desire,
there is no Barrel the better Herring.
When you have tied the true Lovers Knot
it is one of the Curses depending
To Father a brood you never half got,
without any further contending.
When the Wife is brought a Bed, least the Cuckold grow mad
the Midwife she makes an Oration
And cries the poor Infant is so like the Dad
it is worthy of your Observation;
Whilst the good Woman is pleased in her heart
to hear them so Err in their chatting,
Knowing her Husband and she was a-part
when Bully, the Boy was a getting.
Now how to avoid so heavy a Curse,
I do like a Brother advise ye,
Never to take her for better for worse,
if you do, by my troth you are a nizy,
For you without may get her consent
and never make half that Pewter
Then when she’s false, or her Portion is spent
you may change and make choice of another.
LONDON.
Printed for J. Back, at the Black Boy near the
Draw-Bridge on London-Bridge. |
"An Answer to the Advice to the Ladies of London. Wherein is set forth a Glance of their Craft and Subtilty: Or, The Fop well fitted by one of their late Stratagems. Behold and see the Subtilty of London Misses, when They can compleat a Crafty Cheat, they make a prey of Men" | Pepys 4.86
An ANSWER to the
Advice to the Ladies of London.
Wherein is set forth a Glance of their Craft and Subtlety: Or, The Fop well fitted
by one of their late Stratagems.
Behold and see the Subtlety
of London Misses, when
They can complete a Crafty Cheat,
they make a prey of Men.
To the Tune of, The Ladies of London, etc. This may be Printed, R. P.
AS I was Rambling near Temple-Bar,
I met with a Lady of pleasure,
Her beauty shined as bright as a star,
I then was inflamed out of measure,
Like a Gallant I to her did go,
when first I beholding her glory,
But at the length it proved my overthrow,
as you may observe by this story,
She was perfumed with powder nay paint,
did make me her beauty admire,
At first she appeared to me like a Saint,
I being resolved to try her;
Yet at the first she would not be mine,
but threatened to make an Oration,
This was a subtle and crafty design,
the more to encourage my passion.
While we together disputing did stand,
I wittily sounded her temper,
I clapped two yellow Boys into her hand,
at which she began for to simper:
Straightway she yielded to be my Mate,
then home to her Lodging she hasted.
I like a Coxcomb upon her did wait,
where I was sufficiently basted.
I had no sooner approached the place,
with this fair and amorous beauty,
But I immediately fell to embrace
her, counting it to be my duty:
Straight a stout Royster entered the Room,
and running upon me most nimble,
Crying, you Rascal, death shall be your doom,
this made me to quiver and tremble.
Now in a sorrowful Snare I was caught,
this Gallant did hector and Vapor,
I could have given my life for a groat,
for fear of a dent of his Rapier:
Straightway he seemed to pardon his Wife,
because of her humble submission,
Yet he continued to threaten my life,
I was in a woeful condition.
Here I expected I should be destroyed,
with blows I was bitterly wounded,
There was no way in the World to avoid
his Fury, I being surrounded:
his Wife and he both fell upon me,
they being concluded together,
When I discovered my sad destiny,
I wished I had never came thither.
Seven good Guineas I proffered to give,
if he would be pleased to excuse me,
But yet he vowed I no longer would live,
and then he the more did abuse me.
One hundred pound he vowed he would have;
then I of the fray being tired,
And being willing my life for to save;
straight granted what ever he desired.
Was ever Novice so strangely trepanned,
where kindness I could not have any,
But was compelled straight to give him a bond
for paying him every penny:
This hundred pound I give for a kiss,
by which I declare I am undone,
now you young gallants take warning by this
beware of the Ladies of London.
FINIS.
Printed for J. Deacon at the Sign of the Angel
in Guilt-spur-street. |
