From: "Thorsten Michels [Theorie Hiwi]" Newsgroups: alt.humor.best-of-usenet Subject: [rec.arts.books.tolkien] Monty Python's Lord of the Ring Date: 8 Jul 1996 08:45:03 -0700 Subject: Re: Monty Python's Lord of the Ring From: wrbltv3@cbus.mindspring.com (WRBRL-TV News Channel 3) Newsgroup: rec.arts.books.tolkien Mark Thompson wrote: >I.J. Bush wrote: > >> I Like it ! >> >> "Nobody expects the nine Nazgul ! Our prime weapons include .... " > > "Young hobbit, you have one last chance, give us the ring, rerurn > with us to mordor... > You have two last chances,gives us the ring, return with us to >mordor, turn to the shadow... YOU HAVE THREE LAST CHANCES, give us >the ring, return with us to mordor, turn to the shadow and you shall >be free... > > FOUR LAST CHANCES........" BEAUTIFUL. LET'S HEAR MORE THEN SEND IT TO CLEESE!!! "We are the knights who say Mordor! Mordor! Mordor!" "We will kill another elf, if you do not appease us!" "We're knights of old Rohan... The fight gives us a hard-on... Our knights are men.... well, sometimes, men... and hobbits with their swords on.... Old Gondor we rescue alot... We fight orcs, nazgul and trolls alot.....!" (ow! that's really bad) Imrahil: Look! It's the return of the king! Faramir: How do you know he's the king! Imrahil: Well, he hasn't got sh** all over him! Aragorn: Look! Gandalf's fallen to his death with the Balrog! Gandalf: I'm not quite dead.... Aragorn: Gandalf's been mortally wounded in his battle with the Balrog! Gandalf: I'm feeling much better. Aragorn: Open the gates of the teeth of Mordor! I am the king come unto the land! Sauron: Go away and boil your bottoms you sons of a window dresser. We will shoot arrows into the tops of your heads and make castinets out of your testicles already. Now go away Or I will taunt your hobbits a second time...