From: robotech@eyrie.org (Robotech_Master)
Newsgroups: alt.humor.best-of-usenet
Subject: [alt.toys.transformers] The Alt.Toys.Transformers Ranters' Guide, v1.0
Date: 26 Nov 1997 15:40:33 +0100

Subject: The Alt.Toys.Transformers Ranters' Guide, v1.0 
From: Joona I Palaste <palaste@cc.helsinki.fi[REMOVE ME TO ACCESS E-MAIL]=
Newsgroups: alt.toys.transformers

I thought I'd write a humorous document called a "ranters' guide", more
or less, so here is one...

The Alt.Toys.Transformers Ranters' Guide, v1.0
(C) Copyright Joona "I" Palaste 10th November 1997

The purpose of this guide is to faciliate ranting on the newsgroup
alt.toys.transformers. This guide is not to be taken seriously. Anyway,
here we go...

[ ] [ ] G1
    [ ] G2
    [ ] Beast Wars
    [ ] Machine Wars
    [ ] Gobots
    [ ] Transformers
    [ ] Diaclones
    [ ] All transforming robots
    [ ] rule! [ ] suck!

[ ] [ ] Autobots
    [ ] Decepticons
    [ ] Maximals
    [ ] Predacons
    [ ] Guardians
    [ ] Rebels
    [ ] rule! [ ] suck!

[ ] [ ] Optimus Primal
    [ ] Brawn
    [ ] Hitler
    [ ] God
    [ ] Nietzsche
    [ ] lives! [ ] is dead!

[ ] [ ] HooksX
    [ ] PDilloway
    [ ] QWeena
    [ ] Robert Jung
    [ ] The Nixtr
    [ ] MegaBee
    [ ] Harleydo
    [ ] Joona "I" Palaste
    [ ] is a god! [ ] should be shot! [ ] is a faggot! [ ] is a fagget!
    [ ] kicks @$$! [ ] is wrong!

[ ] [ ] PC's
    [ ] Amigas
    [ ] Macs
    [ ] UNIX systems
    [ ] C64/C128's
    [ ] Atari ST's
    [ ] Nintendo 64's
    [ ] PlayStations
    [ ] GameBoys
    [ ] Atari 2600's
    [ ] CASIO CFX-9950G's
    [ ] ENIAC's
    [ ] rule! [ ] suck! [ ] are the only systems for true gurus!
    [ ] are for lamers! [ ] are confusing! [ ] are dead!
    [ ] are still alive!

[ ] How can I find the...
    [ ] FAQ?
    [ ] www.transformers.org webpage?
    [ ] store that still sells TFs in my area?
    [ ] Movie?
    [ ] TF toy I had 6 years ago, but lost?
    [ ] beef sandwich I left on my seat 5 seconds ago?

[ ] Please don't post
    [ ] IN ALL CAPS
    [ ] in all lowercase
    [ ] wiht no cens of gramer ,an -or punktuashun
    [ ] binaries
    [ ] crossposted messages
    [ ] spam
    [ ] anything in
        [ ] English
        [ ] Finnish
        [ ] Swedish
        [ ] Norwegian
        [ ] Danish
        [ ] German
        [ ] French
        [ ] Dutch
        [ ] Russian
        [ ] Japanese
        [ ] Esperanto
        [ ] Volap=FCk
        [ ] Klingon
        [ ] ancient Cybertronian
        [ ] R'Lyehian

[ ] Do you want to know how to...
    [ ] make $50'000'000 in just 2 weeks?
    [ ] post your message to every single e-mail user in the world?
    [ ] steer clear of e-mail viruses?
    [ ] actually copulate with someone?

[ ] Come see our website, it has...
    [ ] a large number of girls
        [ ] naked
        [ ] in bondage
        [ ] perverted in some way
        [ ] in their teens
    [ ] a large number of boys
        [ ] naked
        [ ] in bondage
        [ ] perverted in some way
        [ ] in their teens
    [ ] a wacky
        [ ] guestbook
        [ ] webring
        [ ] list of something
        [ ] document
    [ ] something to do with Transformers, but I forget what

[ ] I have the...
    [ ] blue Bluestreak toy Mint In Box
    [ ] Unicron prototype
    [ ] copy of TFTM with Optimus turning to dust
    [ ] holy Grail
    and will sell it for just...
    [ ] $1000
    [ ] $60'000
    [ ] a million bucks
    [ ] Avogadro's number of dollars
    [ ] a googolplex of dollars

[ ] We have the following toys for sale...
    [ ] X-Men
    [ ] Spawn
    [ ] Star Trek
    [ ] Star Wars
    [ ] Beanie Babies
    [ ] Barbie
    [ ] GI Joe
    [ ] Transformers
    [ ] Please e-mail us for a list!
    [ ] A list is available at our webpage!

[ ] Get a life!

[ ] Yeah, Transformers are cool

[ ] I'm a newbie, could anyone tell me anything?

[ ] Testing...

[ ] Could someone reply to me?

[ ] This ranters' guide is stupid!