From: guymacon@deltanet.com (Guy Macon)
Newsgroups: alt.humor.best-of-usenet
Subject: [soc.religion.quaker] quaker birds
Date: 9 Oct 1997 09:31:07 +0200

Subject: quaker birds 
From: ken maher <kenm@cci.com>
Newsgroups: soc.religion.quaker

friend guy macon wrote

>I am still waiting for the first post about
>the small bird commonly called a "Quaker"...

i have a netnew filter that sends me a daily summary 
of usenet newsgroup postings that use the word "quaker" 
in them.  most are of little interest, but i have had a few 
interesting exchanges with posters who had something to 
say about quakers, ranging from very nice things to rather 
incredible misinformation.  

but the most interesting subject lines come from the 
rec.pets.birds newsgroup.  here's a sample:

-Baby Quakers for sale in Orlando
-My husband was bitten by a Quaker
-Quakers have established breeding colonies in Florida
-Quakers are illegal in California
-I saw my first Quaker today.  Impressive!
-Do Quakers and Budgies cohabitate?

there is also a quaker parakeet mailing list home page 
that has these topics listed:

-Quaker intelligence
-Guido - a Quaker wonder
-Quaker playfulness
-Living with handicapped Quakers
-Quaker songs
-Quaker talking ability 
-State regulations regarding Quakers
-Guess what MY Quaker did? (cute stories) 
-Qtips - helpful tips from people owned by Quakers
-Pictures of feathered Friends

in july 1996, i kept a log of all the usenet newsgroups 
that had postings on them about quakers.  here's the list.  
you can draw your own conclusions:

alt.bible.prophecy
alt.binaries.warez.ibm-pc
alt.books.stephen-king
alt.comp.periphs.mainboard.asus
alt.fan.howard-stern
alt.fan.oj-simpson
alt.philosophy.objectivism
alt.recovery.catholicism
alt.religion.scientology
alt.sex.stories
alt.sex.strip-clubs
alt.sports.basketball.nba.denver-nuggets
alt.sports.college.ivy-league ("Lions beat Quakers!!!")
alt.vampyres
ba.motorcycles
comp.sys.ibm.pc.games.action
misc.fitness.weights
misc.invest.stocks
rec.autos.simulators
rec.autos.sport.indy
rec.collecting
rec.collecting.sport.baseball
rec.collecting.sport.misc
rec.food.cooking
rec.games.computer.quake.misc
rec.games.roguelike.angband
rec.sport.football.college
rec.toys.cars
sci.aquaria
soc.genealogy.computing
soc.religion.mormon
talk.philosophy.humanism
talk.politics.guns
triangle.general
uk.rec.waterways

here are two of my favorite quotes from these posts:

-"quakers are behaviorally predictable and respond
  dependably to common behavioral techniques."

-"in terms of price, size, temperament, talking ability,
  and just plain cuteness, handfed domestic quakers embody
  most of the desirable characteristics of a companion."