Newsgroups: alt.humor.best-of-usenet From: "Lane Gray, Czar Castic" Subject: [rec.humor.oracle.d] Re: Still another obituary Date: 12 Jan 2000 17:22:57 GMT Subject: Re: Still another obituary From: Rich Churcher Newsgroups: rec.humor.oracle.d brightredfish@mindspring.com (Paul L. Kelly) writes: > latebird@usa.net (Ben) attempted to infuriate me by saying: > > >In article <387c3f36.14025394@news.mindspring.com>, > >brightredfish@mindspring.com wrote: > > > >>-Alas, friends, the South American ornamental horned frog has > >>-gone on to his greater glory. His death was the result of a > >>-curious cat and a bathtub full of water. The cat knocked the > >>-frog's plastic terrarium into the tub, the terrarium sank, > >>-and the frog drowned. Three crickets also succumbed in the > >>-accident. > > > >My condolences. Why was the horned frog sitting near a bathtub, anyway? > > Oh great, there you go. I knew it would happen. In the midst of > my grief, someone has to make the "gentle" hint that perhaps this > was a case of negligence, rather than just a simple calamity. Alright > then. I'm willing to stand trial for my crimes...although if you guys > are willing to reduce the charge from amphibicide to involuntary > frogslaughter, I might be willing to plea bargain. I'll need to speak > to my lawyer. Given that the frog was South American (not to mention world famous), you may have to fight extradition. I suggest you blame the entire accident on a Y2K failure in your cat's microchip ID, which of course as a responsible cat owner you had injected at your local humane society. The frog's relatives sue the chip's manufacturer's insewerants company, and everybody's happy. Except the frog, of course.