From: "Daniel Glick" Newsgroups: alt.humor.best-of-usenet Subject: [rec.humor.oracle.d] Re: Welcome Newbies Date: 27 Dec 1999 12:03:58 +0100 Subject: Re: Welcome Newbies From: technoatheist@spamIsBad.email.com (TechnoAtheist) Newsgroups: rec.humor.oracle.d On Sun, 14 Nov 1999 04:40:13 GMT, an infinite group of monkeys claiming to be tph@acm.org (Tom "Tom" Harrington) wrote: >In article <382CF3BD.652D5676@usa.net>, Ben wrote: >>TechnoAtheist wrote: >>> What's the internal maximum PSI of a can of Diet Coke? >> >>A bit less than the PSI reached when I leave it in my car on a hot day. > >True story: Several years ago I lived in Texas for a while. Moving in >occurred after a long, long drive, and while we didn't unpack everything >immediately, the 100-degree F temperatures had us quite keen to get >perishable food items into the refrigerator. > >This refrigerator was one of those that did not have a separate freezer; >instead it had a cheapo metal freezer unit inside the fridge section, >at the top. Unfortunately the door to the freezer compartment had >disappeared, with the result that the "freezer" portion and the >"refrigerator" portion were more or less the same temperature, which >was really not cold enough to actually freeze anything. > >Now, keep in mind that we had just had a very long drive, on a day >far hotter than any of us were accustomed to, and had just spent a >lot of time in the Texas sun moving furniture. Our thought processes >were not quite up to their usual levels, so "idiocy" is probably not >accurate to describe the next decision. > >Also keep in mind that there were, as I recall, at least seven >people in the group, so I cannot conclusively place blame, although >I'm reasonably certain it was not directly my fault. However I'm also >reasonably sure that I was aware of the plan and did not object in any >way. > >Anyway, _someone_ had the bright idea that a good temporary fix for the >fridge would be to stack Coke cans at the front, where the door would >normally go. This would, it was thought, provide a bit of insulation, >and hopefully restore near-normal functionality until a permanent fix >could be found. This done, we settled in for a long, deep sleep from >which, as we later learned, loud unfamiliar noises would not wake us. > >Early the next morning I was drifing toward consciousness when I heard >a low, muffled, but powerful-sounding "thud" noise. What could that >possibly be, I wondered, and drifted back toward sleep. Soon another >thud followed. And another. Suddenly I realized what must be happening, >and headed for the fridge. > >Most of our temporary freezer door was by that time a mass of twisted >aliminum, encased in semi-frozen Coca Cola. Most of the rest of the >fridge was also coated in a sticky, semi-frozen, brown, sticky layer. > >So the answer is "a bit less than the PSI reached in a freezer". The sad thing is that I actually know the answer to this question. Tom wins for impractical application, but here's my tale. A few years ago I used to buy cokes for my office. Occasionally, I would pull one out of the fridge with the bottom popped out. That's when I spotted the 1-800-Get-Coke number on the side of the can Coke Representative: Hi, This is Rebecca. How can I help you? Me: Hi there. I was about to enjoy a frosty can of your fine beverage when I noticed the bottom of the can popped out. It takes quite a bit of effort to push it back in. Needless to say, I am a bit worried that I may get a second can and it may be at the point right before the bottom pops, in which case I may have a refreshing, ice cold hand-grenade, which may be slightly detrimental to my overall enjoyment of the product. Out of curiosity, what's the maximum pressure that one of these cans can hold? CR: [pause. Sometimes, it's not the question but the delivery that makes all the difference] Uhhhhm.... can I put you on hold. *click* At this point I got to hear every version of "Have a Coke and a smile" that there is. I was just getting into the Latvian version when: Second CR: Sir? We're having a bit of trouble tracking this down, but we're still looking. Please hold... *click* I waited and thanked office supplies for speaker phones. Hey, isn't that Swahili? First CR: Sir? Can we get your number so we can call you back? I gave them my home phone number and a few months later my answering machine had a message from a guy at Alcoa (the manufacturers of the can). I had kinda hoped that they had spent that time blowing up cans, but this guy didn't sound like he was any fun at all. Alcoa Rep: Sir, according to our design specifications our soda can can hold a maximum internal pressure of 76 PSI. We do not believe that standard carbonized beverages will ever exceed that. I'm guessing Tom has found a way. I wish the Alcoa guy left a number, I had all kinds of other questions to ask him. Like: What's the electrical impedance of a can of Coke (I wanted to make a radio antenna from a stack of 'em), and what the hell pushed the bottom of the can out?