From: krueger@cs.umn.edu
Newsgroups: alt.humor.best-of-usenet
Subject: [alt.folklore.urban] Re: Fifi (General apolgy)
Date: 22 May 1998 02:13:16 GMT

Subject: Re: Fifi (General apolgy) 
From: "Steve Caskey" <mindless@furrfu.minedu.govt.nz>
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban

Ebeth Jones <Elizabeth.Jones@lmco.com> wrote:
> for some reason i keep expecting someone to wax poetic on the
> vision of salt sprinkled on a slithering slug, but it never
> seems to happen....

In a movie, coming later,
  Ahnie is The Dessicator:

Giant slugs from outer space
  threateninging the human race;
Schwarzenegger, puffing stogies,
  wasting nasty alien bogeys;
Lots of shooting, lots of flames,
  lots of bit-parts without names
Blown away all willy-nilly
  'til the carnage just looks silly.

One by one the slugs will die,
  slashed to bits or blown sky high,
So in the end just one remains,
  the big bad gastropod - the brains
Behind invasion of the planet
  but who's this coming? Good Lord, can it
Be our hero, burned and battered,
  bleeding forehead, kneecap shattered,
Three teeth missing, six more broken,
  (the bits, when swallowed, left him chokin')
Left hand bandaged, right foot missing,
  all this only serves for pissing
Ahnie off, so he gets mean
  And uses some bizarre machine
To blast the boss, which shrivels up,
  Until it's smaller than a B-cup

We're not sure what the weapon is
  But we've got contacts in the biz;
Says one source posting from inside,
  "The secret weapon's sodium chloride."

> Ebeth "but hope springs eternal" Jones

Hope is a strange woman. Athletic, but strange.

Steve "dogger ill" Caskey